Monday, 6 June 2022

Knock Offs




Sincerest
Forms


Knock Offs
by Brian Heiler
Plaid Stallions
ISBN: 9780991692262


Just a quick dip of a review to give a shout out to Knock Offs,  the latest book from Brian Helier. You might remember Brian from his previous book Rack Toys - Cheap Crazed Playthings (reviewed here) or from his regular magazine Toy Ventures (the first issue of which you can find reviewed here). This new tome follows the same pattern as Rack Toys in that it's comprised of colourful photos of a variety of action figures (for the most part) where he gives brief descriptions of the various treasures scattered throughout the book, pitched as a level of eye widened awe mixed with a gentle lampooning of the products in question... which is quite appropriate as this latest offering focuses on the many and varied rip-off toys from various countries, brought out by less than scrupulous companies to cash in on other corporations licenses.

This one is a marked step up from his last book in terms of the quality of the look of the thing. The paper stock is of a much better gsm weight and finish for the material, it seems to me and the layout is quite simple and doesn’t challenge the eye... well, not as much as some of the wonderful abominations which can be found here and there, at any rate.

The book is split into six chapters and here’s a brief run down...

Chapter one is Crime Fighting Copycats... looking at various figures which have been ripped off from those representing heroic individuals, including superheroes such as Spider-Man and Superman. So, in addition to a red coloured Batman, for example, you will also have packs of heroes where the boundaries between companies such as DC and Marvel are dismissed as fun spoiling nonsense. You might find a double pack of Robin and The Hulk, for instance. Or a super team packet which would make the Justice League look tame, comprising Batman, Hulk, Mr. Incredible (yeah, from The Incredibles), The Thing and Spider-Man... all nicely blister packaged onto a card depicting these and other superheroes you might attempt to find in the range... such as Shrek.

Discount Draculas is the title of Chapter Two, which deals with various monster figures brought out to cash in on kids’ insatiable thirst for morbid and gory creatures. Alongside the various fake Frankensteins and Draculas etc you will also see such stuff as the Monster Maniacs... Frankensteiner, The Ultimate Wolf Warrior, Chainsaw Tex and Nightmare Freddy... which take the look of the obvious monsters re-named here but using the muscly arms, legs and torsos of repainted World Wrestling Federation style figures.

Space Madness labels up the third chapter, which looks at the various figures brought out to compete (and make you half think they might even have official licences) and slightly resemble characters from such films and TV shows as Planet Of The Apes, Star Trek and, of course, Star Wars. Three of my favourites here are an R2D2 painted up in blacks and with a big Superman ‘S’ on his chest, the Apes Attack toys, which combined various Ape heads with, again, the big muscly limbs of the wrestling figures and a wonderful Princess fashion doll which uses the leftover costumes from an unproduced line of figures which were supposed to tie in with Logan’s Run.

Chapter Four, Celebrity Impersonators, looks at various figures trying desperately to look like famous names. These include a hybrid item called Mighty Car, which is basically a car with the top half of Mr. T’s head coming out of the roof with muscly arms extending from the sides and... a really nicely titled toy called the Battery Operated Motor Chivalry Jumbo Cycle. Before you get unnecessarily excited by such a proposition, however, I should perhaps enlighten you that it’s basically just a knock off Mr. T on a motor cycle. Also, as mentioned by the author, there seems to be a fair number of action figure heads modelled after Charles Bronson, for some reason.

Toyfoolery, the fifth installment of this brightly coloured cavalcade, looks at various other kinds of attempts by companies to hoodwink the public into parting with their hard earned cash. Among them, at least the dodgy Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle facsimile Amicable Herculean, clearly states its intentions to be at least a friendly addition to the toy box in its title. A less than convincing attempt at copyright infringement evasion might be the figure which claims to be a New Style Ninja Tortoise. Oh... and as an addendum to my comments on this chapter, I’d just like to add that any kid who plays with an unconvincingly bearded GI Joe style figure calked Fighting Russ gets all he or she deserves.

The wonderful book finishes with a section called Bootleg Art and this basically deals with some of the more famous, prolific or just plain curious individuals who make their own custom figures, many of them now making a good living from creating these bizarre toys or cross breeds for sale. Each set of illustrations is, for the most part, accompanied by a short history of how this started, written by the artists in question. It’s here that you will find such treasures as a pink stormtrooper labelled up as being part of the Gay Empire (a special 10th Anniversary Homotrooper, according to the blurb on the package) or a couple of recycled Star Wars action figures of Walrus Man and Green Greedo, wearing fashionable 1980s suits and accompanied by a beautifully kitsch package identifying them as Mos Eisley Vice. I do, however, pity the fool who finds their gaze met by the ET/Mr. T amalgam, Mr. ET... oh yeah, I’m not going to unsee that one in a hurry.

And there you have it... once again, Brian Heiler unleashes yet another precious gem of a ‘book you never knew you wanted’ with Knock Offs and, frankly, anyone who still has the heart of a child (which is pretty much every guy I know, for starters), would probably find this tome of interest. Give this one a go if it sounds up your street, for sure.

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